Quiet in His Love

I'm sitting here in my living room thinking about the list of events happening this week. The events that I need to drive to. Places my children need to be. An event my husband doesn't want to miss by doing the driving. It isn't the fear of driving that gets me. It's the fear of having an attack...a panic attack. It sucks! Blunt...yes. True...100 times yes. Questions swirl...Why...? I have no answers. Only more questions. More worries. More roadblocks. More hurdles to find a way around since jumping over them feels beyond impossible. This is not me. Yet, it is happening inside me. What will help? Better food choices? More sleep? Walks every day? Less caffeine? More water? Oh how I wish I had answers. Praying feels undoable...feels forced...feels unwieldy. This is not me. Where is the lady who likes to meet a friend for coffee? The lady who enjoys a drive out in the country? The lady who enjoys taking her family to the places they need to go? The lady who can and has bee...

Today, I am living challenged. I am challenged by anxiety, by stress, by my mind. Have you ever been challenged by those things? It feels as though the whole world, at least in your mind, is spinning completely out of control. I hate it. Most people, I think, don't want to talk about anxiety, about worry, about fear. It makes them look weak or less somehow. Why? Should it? Does it need to? Oh, if only... If only we could all pretend all the time that everything is "perfect." Would that help the situation? Change the reality? No. It would be a lie. Nobody wants that. I hope not anyway. Oh, friends, please be kind to yourself and others. This road I am on feels long, uneven, filled with potholes, scattered with booby traps, and hard...so very hard. When life narrows to a small focus and it feels like every thing that used to be a joy no longer is, you may feel the need to throw your hands up and cry out. It's okay to do so. Truly. I won't judge you...hopefully other...

It's been too long since I've hopped on here and shared my heart with all of you. Life, lately, has felt overwhelming, scary, anxiety-ridden. Things that normally don't get me worked up or cause anxiety in me have started to again. Strong anxiety and even panic attacks have been an on-again off-again thing with me over the years...even in my teens. Now, as a woman almost halfway through my forties, I feel as though I should be a "big girl" with a certificate of graduation from all things anxiety and fear. Honestly, I think sometimes my increase in age also contributes to my increase in anxiety and fear and "Oh wow, I messed up and can't do it over" moments. Why? Can I blame hormones? Maybe. Can I blame too much caffeine? Probably a contributor. Can I blame Satan? I imagine on some level I can. Can I blame...? Will placing blame help me in this moment? Unlikely. What will help me? Refocusing... Yes, refocusing. At least, it will help to some degree. Y...

I began something today that I should have started in earnest many months (even years) ago.  Truly, I regret not starting this important prayer work sooner.  I began to prayer for our nation.  In this time of confusion, unrest, and, for some, fear, I feel that it is beyond necessary to pray like we have never prayed before.  Our Lord is for us!  We need to come to Him, kneel before Him, reach out to Him...as never before. In 2 Chronicles, we find a powerful call in verse 7:14.  One you likely have read, or heard, many times over the last several months and years.  If you have a Bible handy, turn there now with me.  It says, "if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land."  Wow!  Isn't that verse compelling?  If no one else does, I need to do what this verse says.  Take ...

Blessings come in many forms.  God uses His vast array of resources to send us blessings.  The blessings may be little, bitty things, or they may be so large that our socks get knocked off.  A blessing is a blessing whether it is tiny or magnificent.  And truly some of the "tiny" blessings have the most impact when they arrive at just the "right" moment. In March, my husband and I were heading out of town on a Wednesday to spend two nights away together in honor of our upcoming anniversary.  We were getting hungry so we got in the drive through line at a fast food restaurant.  When we arrived at the window to pay for our food, we were told that our food was payed for and God bless.  I couldn't help it...I began to cry. We hadn't ordered much, but the impact of that "small" act was a sweet balm to my soul.  With a job hunt in the works, since my husband had lost his job earlier in the year, money was tight.  Little do some people know of the ...

Today is the day to step boldly into the future God has for you.  No more holding back because of fear.  Leave fear behind.  Tell the doubts to hush up.  Bring on the faith...the faith of Peter stepping out of the boat...the faith contained in a mustard seed...the faith to move mountains.  We have been given that faith through our relationship with Christ.  Boldness may not come naturally to you, but with Christ you can walk in it.  He will equip you.  It is Time!  Your path is before you.  He has set it for you.  There will be obstacles along the way, but if you lean on Him, He will guide you through, around, and over them.  No more fear!  Just faith...prayer...God's grace, mercy, and leading...and a lot of joy.