Quiet in His Love

Today, I am living challenged. I am challenged by anxiety, by stress, by my mind. Have you ever been challenged by those things? It feels as though the whole world, at least in your mind, is spinning completely out of control. I hate it. Most people, I think, don't want to talk about anxiety, about worry, about fear. It makes them look weak or less somehow. Why? Should it? Does it need to? Oh, if only... If only we could all pretend all the time that everything is "perfect." Would that help the situation? Change the reality? No. It would be a lie. Nobody wants that. I hope not anyway. Oh, friends, please be kind to yourself and others. This road I am on feels long, uneven, filled with potholes, scattered with booby traps, and hard...so very hard. When life narrows to a small focus and it feels like every thing that used to be a joy no longer is, you may feel the need to throw your hands up and cry out. It's okay to do so. Truly. I won't judge you...hopefully other...

I have undergone many changes in my life in the last two years. Can you relate? It has been a series of trials and little joys and amazing accomplishments and deep sorrows. Life has turned one way then another and twisted back around again. There has been one constant, even when I don't feel or see it. God has been with me at every turn, through every valley, on every mountaintop. I have struggled with this. So many scars exist in me. The most painful today is the loss of my father. I have had many David moments over the last almost nine months. Mostly the angry, questioning, confused David moments. The moments where it takes all my strength and my tiny bit of faith to say, "God is good all the time." Or, "I trust You." These are truths that I have a hard time admitting, yet I cannot lie. Admitting your struggles and your fears and choosing vulnerability helps expose those deeply hidden things to the light of the Son. And in that light we can see more clearly. ...